Girlfriend constantly puts me down reddit. Goals, lifestyle, religious and political views, sexually.
Girlfriend constantly puts me down reddit. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast.
Girlfriend constantly puts me down reddit I'm always being criticised, and recently I've noticed that my siblings are treated differently from me. " I've been direct in telling her that I'm mature enough to handle disappointment if plans fall through, but my problem is her failure to She constantly puts herself down, and always argues whenever I try to intervene. When someone shows you who they are, believe them. I'm speaking from personal experience that getting hit on when you're really not in the mood for it/ in a relationship (Especially in situations like work where you can't really fight back in any way) is super frustrating and can be creepy. Done. I don't know how to help. tonight we were talking about semi automatic rifles and he is a police officer, generally an amazing one, calls other officers out of their shit yaddah yaddah. Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now Girlfriend testing me constantly . calls me a monkey looking person in front of girls called my brother the most retarded person (all because I posted a voice recording of him being cute) which just infuriates me always singles me out on something Whenever it's one-on-one, he always acts so nice to me and calls me smart, funny, or anything really. The conversations. I grew up with my mom always watching and snooping over me to make sure I was studying at my desk. Her first comment was "why are She’s constantly putting me on the shit list for not listening. I’m growing very tired of this. Yeah, I did mention above that it depends on the context in which OP's girlfriend is bringing up these interactions. After 2,5 years, I have started to really get tired of the attitude. It’s interrupting my flow. Let me give you an example. I don't know what to do. Secondly, someone who puts you down for the things you love and like does not truly love you. I would suggest for you to speak with your girlfriend , properly sit down with her. If you freak out and constantly ask to help her, it puts attention on the panic attack If I feel something with a soothing texture is calms me down. “I can contribute $50 a week, is that okay to start?” That kind of thing. My Dad Always Puts Me Down . I feel manipulated, I feel like he's gas lighting me & i feel so trapped. It has My (22F) BF (22M) always puts me down for no reason I’ll just give you guys an insight of our relationship first: We were best friends since we were 15 yo and we started flirting when we were 20 and we’ve been dating for a couple of months now. My dad constantly did it to me, and in turn I didn't know how to relate to others without being annoying. I had a boyfriend who would never post about us on social media. He said that he doesn’t need to ask me questions about my life because he already knows everything about me. I have my own condo I've told her very clearly that this bothers me. Boyfriend puts me down whenever he's upset and refuses to stop. For a full list of our rules/more Get app Get the Reddit app Log In Log in to Reddit. I don't honestly know what to do at this point. " I had a friend who constantly negged me like this too. stop going on reddit and expecting other people to magically fix things for you or tell you something that will make it all better and start actually giving a shit about yourself, oh and one more thing, your gf was a B-I-T-C-H, she never loved you or gave a shit about GF never listens to me, constantly complains and always puts the blame on me. Nothing was ever good enough. I don't know what to do with my girlfriend anymore. Toxic Logically I know that makes no sense but when my anxiety is flaring up, I can't help it. At this point I am in college going for my bachelor’s in mechanical engineering and she is also in college except she is going for her masters. Please make sure you read our rules here. You should repeat that sentence every time she does it by the way. We started I think firstly she’s way too old for you. Like many relationships we have had our ups and downs. How do I deal with this? I love her but this has to stop. Preface: I'm Asian, so I don't really move out unless I have an explicit need to. It's just how she is. I'm going bonkers over here. She always tells me how she feels like she’s punching with me, says she isn’t sure why I’m with her coz she feels like I’m out of her league, says she doesn’t like her body etc. View community ranking In the Top 1% of largest communities on Reddit. she puts down my hair, my appearance, my body, my weight, my makeup, my clothing, my college major, my ethnicity, my bedroom, my hobbies, my other I’m mostly quiet at work and my boss constantly puts me down. The relationship Father constantly puts me down and criticizes me for being a dead-beat, useless leech. She had decided to end the relationship if it continued. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. Girlfriend (25F) has been testing me (25M) lately, and I wonder if this behaviour is acceptable. She still wrestles her friends from time to time and is a very technical wrestler it's quite impressive. Everything in person is great, I have no problems with her in-person. To constantly be told that you aren’t doing good enough and to just be constantly put down helps nothing. I’ve been dating a woman for two months, we immediately decided to be exclusive since neither enjoys multi-dating. My husband constantly puts me down in front of my friends, his friends, and our joint friends. She'd silently slide open my window or the door and bust me if I was reading a book instead of studying. My (20M) Boyfriend (24M) constantly puts me down and calls it 'Guidance'. What she said last weekend is still eating at me. I was reflecting on this the other day when my therapist asked me where my insecurities and self doubt stem from. It lands on this piece of cloth that she is careful about. Relationships Like a lot of people, my girlfriend has an iPhone which she uses to look at various social media and to message friends. You are with an abuser. This is usually when she brings up the past (times when she had feelings for me and i didnt for her, me having exgirlfriends, female coworkers and friends). I’ll call her Molly. The problem is: I'm human, therefore flawed sometimes. I'll give some examples. I tried to be mindful but the stress was always there. We’re both people who enjoy tough as our love language. I'm 29, she's 26. If I show up five minutes late (rarely) she will say “if you apply to a new job, they’ll be hearing about this”. This is not a habit. After a few hours of being online and not talking to me she tells me that she knows and doesn't want to talk to me because she may say things she doesn't want to. tl;dr: my girlfriend has a long history of trauma and emotional abuse that I have found myself having to compensate for. To me that’s what confirms that this is mooching. I have a non supportive girlfriend that is intelligent and constantly puts me down about not being at her level. You are all alone in this relationship. My mom constantly puts herself down in front of me and I can’t stand it anymore. Same like you, I was just going through a rough period with uni My girlfriend argues about everything, says she doesnt want to put in the effort because she doesn't need to. For instance, “There have been many times when I’ve felt really undervalued and unloved when you’ve said certain things to me. It’s embarrassing sometimes because she does it front of people. However, there’s one problem. I am 37f and my husband is 37m. Relationships This has been an issue our entire relationship but it's starting to get to me more recently. Absolutely clicked with her more so than anyone I've ever met. (30m) girlfriend(28F) told me she miscarried when she actually had an It makes me sooo uncomfortable when someone's watching what I'm doing on my screen. Unfortunately, she's also going through financial My husband [30M] is constantly criticizing me [30 F] , together ten years, married for 3 . She has irrational emotional outbursts. On both ends-Why be with someone you hate to be around so much you constantly feel the need to berate them?And why would you go out with someone that makes you feel bad for existing?I'm sure View community ranking In the Top 1% of largest communities on Reddit. She will say that she "knows me" and "knows who I am" so she "knows" I can't do whatever it is I want to accomplish. The only issue is, she keeps putting herself down all the time. Welcome to r/relationship_advice. That’s predatory af. I(25M) left my Girlfriend(23F) because she was constantly scaring me which resulted in me falling down the stairs and breaking two fingers, I am considering taking her back but I am not sure, I would like some advice from you lovely people. I enjoy holding Now my night is ruined and everyone’s playing games and laughing together without me because I just wasn’t in the mood to play a game after being put down and made fun of multiple times. It’s maybe once every six months. The way I laugh or something I say. It is at the point where when we have plans I sometimes get worried that tonight will be a night where she goes off and tries to end it and it puts me in a sour mood worrying about it. My main question is there any possible way to fix My girlfriend argues about everything, says she doesnt want to put in the effort because she doesn't need to. write a simple, elegant breakup letter, and move on with your life immediately I finally got a good job, it took years cause I was being rejected by everywhere I applied to, and now I make enough money to get my own place, well my schedule changed and we'd play video games at different times, than he asks me if I'm still living with my grandma, I say yes and he starts laughing and saying I'm literally a "subhuman leech Tell her it that it feels hurtful when she puts you down, because it seems like she is saying that you are dumb. I'm sick of my "friends", they always call me an incel and try to put me down. My girlfriend gets angry at me a lot for small things. I’ve told her that I don’t care about my sexual past but she doesn’t understand. Goals, lifestyle, religious and political views, sexually. He never showed me a reason to distrusts him. Recently she has developed the most despicable habit of talking to herself while she is on the computer. Constantly. That's his agenda. She isnt down in the dumps or anything and actually she has a lot This is a place where you can ask for advice on many subjects. if she loves you she will come to her senses. For me, it helps for someone to say, "You haven't done anything you need to apologize for, but it's okay if it makes you feel better to say it. My dad mentioned he wanted me to be happy, and he’s okay as long as I’m okay but he’s never actually said he’s proud of me. He constantly tells me off if I talk even slightly to loud in public (I used to have to talk really loud or repeat things over in order for my family and ex partners to listen to me) he always tells me off for how I sit out and Tell her point blank, "It turns me off when you're constantly exploding from both ends. Like you, it seems my only reason for existence was to make her happy. I honestly don't know what to do. No, she is not on birth control, so I don't think it's any medication or drug that has her behave this way. TLDR: Girlfriend constantly prioritizes her work 24/7 and talks about work even we are together. My boyfriend puts me down for my quirks and I feel like is trying to change me instead of loving me for who I am. I feel like she’s gonna make me explode. Another was when she tried to kick me out of her place because I told her I was was going to a late night party (female friend). I had a boyfriend I was into and she kept telling me to move on already for no reason. He recently started a new job and his colleagues have a group FB chat, which he is always on (I think he feels pressure to reply immediately to stay “in” with the group as he doesn’t have many friends). Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. She always says she is sorry and tells me "I'll make it up to you" and never does. I (20M) recently moved in with my boyfriend (24M) of a year and a half and I hate it, I constantly clean up after him and he calls me lazy all the time just because I haven't found a job yet although I have been looking every single day since I've moved here, he acts like I'll I do is lay in bed in my pyjamas. I was in the same situation as you. My father was ultra critical about any perceived weight gain. I just want to not be stressed. Or check it out in the app stores My girlfriend (23/f) constantly demeans and insults me (25/m) you are disrespecting yourself and honestly believing deep down that you don't deserve any better. No pure image posts. He’s too old for this. This is when I go to my room, or quit engaging in conversations. I put the cup down on the coffee table and happened to spill a few drops. I would say that the fact she constantly puts you down is why you're weirdly attached to her. And to make matters worse; it’s also the mood-swings. You should be like that guy that achieved that thing that there's no way you can achieve easily with your resources We’ve been dating for almost 4 months (so not very long). When I (f) was 20 I got into a relationship with a 36 year old (m) and was in it for four years until I got out nearly two years ago. Also, the usage of "pick me" on the internet seems to boil down to a woman who does anything for her partner to please him. But I can't let this go. It took me taking her out for her to finally tell me it’s because of a exam. My (30 year old) boyfriend tends to put me down whenever he's upset. So i (17M) have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for close to 8 months, everything at the beginning was amazing like alwaysbut with due time she started to complain about everything thing i do, she will get mad at me for laughing at the wrong time, she Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. However, I feel like I constantly have to give her Advice on GF who’s public affection puts me off . I'm the good one, you're shit. Plus she treats you this way because you tolerate it View community ranking In the Top 1% of largest communities on Reddit. If she doesn't listen , trust me she will when she knows she's about to lose you. I make a lot of time for her and travel down there as much as possible and she comes home to see me at every opportunity. It's like he is saying it to get a reaction or put me down. She tells me that she's making up for lost time since she started working later in life. Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. Ive also been in a relationship like this (for 1 year and 1 month) She ended up breaking up with me because I couldnt make do anything myself without her aproval. At least once per hour. Is your girlfriend me? Jk, your girlfriend and I are a bit different. My girlfriend sometimes has bad panic attacks and I need advice on how to out. If he apologizes and stops, everything is solved. Her work is all that we talk about. Here is her behaviour - I'm left confused. Log In / Sign Up; Advertise on Reddit; Shop Collectible Avatars; me like trash My older sibling just treats me like I'm the problem in the family when I was just sitting there They constantly put me down and make me feel like I am nothing . “Because you’re stupid The thing is my parents have watched me through everything, and sure I know they’re proud of me on some level as well but at the same time I’m not sure. He didn’t yell, but instead was stern and put it back onto me. At the same time, she is always expecting me to dispel her many lashes against herself, and takes any of my silences or moments of thought as confirmation. Basically, they gave me advice without ignoring me or invalidating me while still suggesting that I have the control. I can trace back my (first) anorexia and (then) bulimia which graduated to modified ED (chew & spit and punishment starvation/exercise, among other horrible habits) to both of my parents and the constant commentary they made about my weight, appearance, and eating habits. though I wasn’t as young as you were, I really relate to your story. he is mexican & has a very large traditional family, meaning they’re always getting together in large groups for birthdays, holidays, everything. I'm sure I do many annoying She would put me down about absolutely anything and everything. Just for contrast, you, WoffyBear, said this: People who love you go to the ends of the earth to make you happy. Me [24/M] with my girlfriend [23/F] of ~ 2 years: her constant social media consumption infuriates me but she seems to addicted to ever stop. Hey reddit. They stress her out so much about me even. He makes me feel bad and picks at everything about me. You cannot fix this problem for her. Some people cannot relate to others without constantly messing with them It's fairly common with young guys - and it used to be my case when I was young (until around 14-15, it took a couple years to phase out though). He says the meanest things to me. 5 years now. UPDATE: I've just discovered that my (M29)'s girlfriend (F27)'s family is putting me down in front of her My girlfriend only ever does what I want to do IF she wants to do it too or its not inconvenient for her, and it makes me very sad. It feels like he has a problem with every move I make. It's to tear you down and put you in "your place" that he thinks you belong. Tl;dr my(32m) girlfriend(32f) of 3 (10 complicated) years (living together for 2. Even little things like, my sister got diagnosed with anorexia, and has been given No direct linking to anywhere on reddit. All the fucking time, it drives me insane because then she gets really upset with me and thinks I Over the 5 years we have essentially grown up together; I feel like a big part of me has been shaped by her and likewise for her too. Then my mom He told me I was being ridiculous, and that he doesn’t need to give me compliments because I “should know” that he finds me attractive since he married me. I never had much confidence to begin with but her saying things like that make me even more insecure. She's so unhappy all the time and it's bringing me down and I feel like an asshole and I'm absolutely I dumped her because I suspect she has a narcissistic personality disorder. Me and Molly grew very close last year in school and this year I became quite close with one of Molly’s This happens anytime I have something going for me or have good things happen to me. If this is her way of encouraging me to do better, it’s not working. Does he put you down at other times too? It took me threatening to leave for her to go and get a therapist, and there's a part of me that wonders whether me going for good would mean she had no choice but to confront her parents and hold them accountable. I came to my mine at the I don't really share negative opinions about her as a person, I guess. Or tell me if you think I’m being too dramatic about it all. If I make the slightest mistake at anything, or make any kind of bad decision, she attacks my Skip to main content Open menu Open navigation Go to Reddit Home A chip My girlfriend of 4 months is always instigating fights with me. Keeping your self esteem down is a way to lever the power hierarchy in this relationship. Tell him the problem. My husband has constantly been putting me down and calling me “useless”, “worthless” “stupid”, “and that I “can’t do anything right” and just always gets mad at me, cusses at me, calls me names, and criticizes me for almost everything I do. Fast forward to his next girlfriend who he got together My girlfriend (20F) needs me (21M) to do all her written homework assignments. Simply put, there is no All I do is ask my mom after she yells at me, why she always want to argue with me. She mentions she wants to go to a restaurant she hasn't been to in forever? I book reservations for Friday. In the past 6 months your post is literally what my boyfriend told he was upset about. Example: I went to nightclub with my friend around 10pm and my gf said she would join us around 11-12pm, since she had work and Girlfriend is constantly comparing me to other, more successful men . She uses excuses that aren’t related to her other challenges. So if she’s unhappy it’s because of something I’m not I'm not sure what answers I'm looking for. Recently I started thinking, as of this point I want to marry her but I’m afraid- what if down the line we’ll argue so much that either her or me, will just have enough and want to leave. Anything i say isn't good enough. He says I don’t use my brain. I love my bf but I don’t understand why he puts me down so much He told you. He isn't depressed, I actually am depressed and I don't emotionally dump on him like this. I can't help her, and that puts me down This is Reddit's very own solution-hub. Suggesting that my boyfriend doesn't love me, which is Puts me in a position where I either (A) Have to convince her I'm not perfect, or (B) Live up to an unrealistic expectation of perfection. My girlfriend’s (33F) dad (55M) constantly puts me (32M) down as a joke but it hurts, what can I do about it? it feels like he throws put down after put down at me. we met three years ago. If he continues, backflip out of the relationship. My girlfriend (24F) keeps putting me (25M) down after an argument, has she stopped loving me? So some backstory, I was invited to her friends birthday meal. & with them being such a large group there’s pretty much some sort of gathering every week that he wants to go to. A lot of people are at least a bit manipulative, and it’s a Is your partner taking advantage of you—while likely saying you are weak, useless, and uninteresting—because you are reliable, responsible, and resilient? You are most likely not incapable, Make good use of “I” messages. On the other hand, I'm a strong writer who routinely proofread essays on my friends' behalf. We need to talk about this and figure it out, we'll see someone if you want to like a therapist, but I'm not letting these comments slide anymore. it wasn't like this right away but i should have seen the warning signs. I am unhappy with her and I know I will be unhappy without her. And yeah, she has a lot of friends, and she balances her free time between me, her family, and her friends, usually with me getting the upper edge. . We’ve been married for 12 years, and we have two kids Since a half a year ago, my long term friend has started talking to me differently. he has a great job so he has to be fairly attentive to his work phone but it became too much. Then he starts laughing and talking about how the rides and animatronics look cheap. I told her I'm really getting tired of the insults and all she kept saying was, "you're interrupting me. * Constantly questions choices I make - like the other day we went outside to take care of the ice on the driveway. We’ll be on the phone and a topic comes up and I don’t know about it so I ask more and she’s like I already fucking told you. Then see how she reacts. So fucking tell him. My boyfriend (21) , of 2 1/2 years who I (19) also have a 11 month daughter with, has constantly been putting me down and making me feel bad about myself. Girlfriend is destroying myself esteem and is calling me gay f(22) m(21) my girlfriend always finds ways to put me down of belittle me she 5’6 and will constantly tell me I’m short or that I’m not tall or that we’re the same height she will tell me I look okay He’s a really sweet guy but he forgets things, like while on call I’ll say there’s something I want to do but he forgets, I tell him all the things I like but when it comes to him getting me a gift he doesn’t know what to get, he forgets things and I have to nail it into his head so he remembers and does it and deep down it hurts But he always subtlety puts me down for my love of disney world. However, he often puts me down and it has started to really hurt me. I finally snapped and she said I'm being too sensitive and it's not offensive because she said it nicely. depressed friend constantly puts me down . My boyfriend always puts me down and says I'm a horrible person, I'm just sat here crying but don't yet have the strength to leave. Or check it out in the app stores (M,21) girlfriend (F, 30) constantly makes me feel bad about myself. We've been together for about 2. 5 years) constantly puts me down for Advertisement Coins 0 coins Premium Powerups Explore Gaming Valheim Minecraft Boyfriend (23 M) is consistently choosing other people over me (22 F) Hello world! My boyfriend and I have been dating since September and all has Skip to main content Open menu Open navigation Go to Reddit Home A chip My girlfriend [F26] constantly compares me [M29] to other men in her life. I'm 19, and I've lost a lot of weight so I'd like to finally dress how I always wanted, but my mom constantly puts me down for it. I’m in the same situation with my boyfriend at the moment, so I sympathise with you. Seriously listen, this is what you need to do. I also wonder if maybe my neurosis from childhood makes My husband compliments his brother's girlfriend constantly, but doesn't to me because "I should already know" Good afternoon everyone. We always talk through all the arguments and we always figure everything out. I know that depression is no joke, and should be taken serious, and I have done all I could, trying to encourage her, share her empathy and listen whenever she needed, cheered for her when things went better, and told her it was okay to be My girlfriend F17 of 6 months always put herself first emotionally and puts me M16 down and guilt trips me when I feel down My dude, you're allowed to dump people. She constantly puts me down and says that she wishes I was a virgin and her first and vice versa. Relationships We've been dating for about 2 years, give or take. I find it so hard to make new friends which is the reason I even stay. If she keeps ripping right before the deed, just put your clothes back on & leave the room. Even if she didn't, she's just constantly negative and puts me down so after 4 months, I used one of her "dump me" challenges and dumped her. I lived with my mom for years and was subjected to constant emotional abuse. For a full list of our rules/more my boyfriend (25m) always chooses his family over me (23f). Now he's coming & telling me that I'm running from responsibility not wanting to be with him anymore. At first, I was She consistently puts me down, criticizing my achievements and goals. My first instinct was to try scraping the ice, as opposed to throwing a ton of ice melt down on the concrete. Reply reply blumoon138 • Look, I'm not saying im perfect. That answer was always sus and it was a point of contention throughout our time together; I felt he wasn’t proud to show me to his loved ones. You're making gaining her approval your main priority and because you almost never get it, Any partner who puts you down, has an agenda to control you and manipulate you. My girlfriend broke up with me twice in the past, both times were very tough for me and shortly afterwards on both occasions she got with another guy. My girlfriend (female, 24) and I (male, 25) have been together for about a year, and known each other for the majority of our young lives and always been romantically into eachother before we made it official a year or so ago. I can only speak for myself, but I enjoy her a lot and surprised how compatible we are. She constantly puts herself down, and always argues whenever I try to intervene. I guess the ability to just vent might help me process. Here’s some background. She's sure to let me know that she's not too disappointed, but I can hear it in her voice, and read between the lines in her texts to know that she must think I'm a huge dick when I forget something. I’ve been good friends with this girl in school for about two years. It constantly puts me on edge and makes me feel like I'm not good enough/ doing enough or loving him enough and it is so stressful. "You complain so much that it gets When I (f) was 20 I got into a relationship with a 36 year old (m) and was in it for four years until I got out nearly two years ago. ADMIN MOD My friend constantly puts me down in group situations . I'm not diagnosed with depression or anxiety. The best way to stop a panic attack is focusing attention on something else as a distraction. She would even call me when I was with friends just to tell me I'm either too skinny or too chubby (my mom is largely overweight) ,my tattoos, that I'm particularly spotty that day, that my hair is awful, that she doesn't like my makeup or decisions I make. Like I can physically "feel" the energy of the gaze. We'd like to take this time to remind users that: We do not allow any type of am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors. Tonight I ordered pizza and told him there wasn't any place to tip online and we'd have to give a tip in I(25M) left my Girlfriend(23F) because she was constantly scaring me which resulted in me falling down the stairs and breaking two fingers, I am considering taking her back but I am not sure, I would like some advice from you lovely people. Insults me, never listens, complains about things when she told me she wants me to do them. My GF (F24) gets extremely angry over small things. My girlfriend (20F) constantly gets upset by me She wants me to constantly go out to do stuff (even better for her if it costs something), because she gets super bored easily. New guy I'm dating constantly puts his phone on flight mode, why? does he have a wife, am I the other woman. "He has been trying to bring me down and tell me that I will never get better than him anyway & that I was a fat and Get app Get the Reddit app Log In Log in to Reddit. For example, when I shared my decision to go to med school and take the MCAT exam, she dismissed it as annoying and questioned my choice, suggesting I could be something else. My savings can probably last 2 years for rent if I should move. But, whenever I'm around she is constantly insulting me, no matter who's around to hear it. " He also frequently says things like 'you don't love me' etc. Please tell me why you think my mom does this or if you guys have experienced the same issue. He said it was because he wanted to keep me private because he loved me so much. People with low self esteem and insecurities are easier to walk all over. I always jump on the opportunity to make her happy. My girlfriend used to be a wrestler in high school and a little bit in college. For example: One morning I was making tea. He picks at it and points out how That was also the very first time he told me that he was pressured and tired having to keep reassuring me because I was constantly upset/ angry and venting things to him. When it actually happens she just lies down on to the bed and wants me to do all the work, Like, it drives me nuts that I can't ever cook without my mom constantly sticking her head in the kitchen to offer me five suggestions and three criticisms, but then I take a deep breath and remember the running family joke of how whenever my mom makes something and ANYONE tells her it's good, we all start exchanging looks because we know she's Wife is constantly melting down, freaking out over things that don't matter, and trying to blame me for things I didn't do or would be her responsibility. You should thank god I'm with you. And she just Hard, hard truth. I get irritated when she interrupts me, doesn't pay attention when I'm trying to explain a point, when she leaves her stuff lying around or doesn't put things back where the belong, when she says she will do something but doesn't always follow through, normal relationship stuff like that. I imagine no matter how much stock she puts into me remembering things, it comes across like she's forgettable, which isn't how I want to come across. I met my girlfriend roughly 5 months ago. It'd make me a lot happier to have someone around who actually encourages me to speak up and say what's on my mind, or at least won't shoot me down when I try. For example, earlier I was watching disney world ride-thru vlogs in the living room (its been a nice escape during the stress of covid) and he comes in and starts watching with me. My ex was constantly on his phone, while on the couch, in the car, on hikes. Ambitious_Double3078 Let me start by saying that we've been together for quite a while, in nearly all aspects we're completely happy together but this is really bugging me. Relationships She puts me down even though she loves me, and I feel like I contribute nothing. Shes in university and spends half her time living in a different city. Can I ever rebuild the trust? Have you ever been blindsided by hurtful words from someone you love? If your partner regularly diminishes you with criticism or tries to control you with accusations, you may be the victim of emotional abuse. I started meditation to try and cope and i did find a difference in how I responded to her abuse: i was calmer, able to keep my cool and realised what was happening was exterior to myself, i was just watching a situation unfold and therefore had greater control It’s like she puts herself in a position where she is always the victim. Communicate with this person who you call your boyfriend. Wants to ice skate, but there's no frozen ponds around My loving girlfriend moved in with me three months ago and thought it would be romantic to share the desk. I've unironically seen a woman called a "pick me" cause she cooked for her husband all the time, even though he was paying all the bills He told me he couldn't handle it anymore many times. I can’t stand it anymore. Although, I probably experience small amounts of either depending on the day or whats going on in my life. To be completely honest, looks wise I know I could probably do better. He keeps calling me dumb, stupid, a bitch, a thot, slow, etc. It’s almost like she can’t handle me being optimistic and happy about things so she brings me down to where she is. Our relationship has lasted about a year. When you truly love someone you would never do such a thing. A former girlfriend sat me down and said it made her feel unimportant. She's a very math-oriented person and writes at a high school level despite being a junior in college. But I’m not with her I’m (M23) in need of some advice. “This isn’t easy for me to bring up but I’m concerned about you. He was extremely patient with me, he would comply if I asked him to block someone, reassure me he cared for me and had no interest in anyone else. She needs therapy. And recently i've been more and more down in the dumps whenever she's like this. Sounds exhausting. I constantly try to put my best friend up and I try to choose my moments to make a "teasing" joke carefully; I didn't think that'd be so much to ask for back. Observe his reaction. Your partner is supposed to make you feel like you’re on top of the world, but instead, they make you feel like you’re coming down with the flu She is manipulative. My girlfriend and the stepmom, and pretty much everyone else, says this is what he does to people that Anytime I try to grow as a person or advance my career, education, whatever, my wife always discourages me and puts me down. She’s admitted she is hot headed but has promised to try and work on herself. As the title says, I want to become intelligent, but I'm no where near that. Every little thing. I have the worst self esteem now. you're interrupting me. She would tell me how she didnt REALLY need me, have other people she flirted with while being with me and not only telling me about it but also JOKING about it. I have hobbies she didn't expect of me (theatre!). The idea seemed benign enough and for a while it was wonderful. Just to give a simple example: her phone wasn’t working, so she couldn’t check her account balance. He said I was a negative energy and he needed me to reciprocate the same love and energy he's been giving me. Simply put, there is no magic formula that will change who she is and how she treats you. My last girlfriend was convinced I was the greatest thing ever. It's disgusting, unattractive, and you need to be more discreet about it you want our sex life to resume". shortly followed by annoyance I tell her yesterday afternoon that I feel more and more like our contact is breaking down and that I want to do something about this. She feels guilty for, as she puts it, "letting me down. I know it’s stressful but why am I being treated like I did something. She'll learn. He gets off on putting you down and ruling the roost. I feel like if the roles were swapped here, I’d be a labeled as a misogynistic man, which I totally understand why. I'm not. After I’m attacked by all of my siblings, and my mom, it makes me feel upset and not want to be near them at all. I laid my girlfriend to rest on Friday. My girlfriend said something Obviously, a sign of an emotionally draining relationship is when you are left tired, frustrated, and annoyed after spending time with your partner. She will say I am too mentally ill to go through with these challenges, and that people don't ever change. or if you just get off putting me down. Hello everyone. Example: I went to nightclub with my friend around 10pm and my gf said she would join us around 11-12pm, since she had work and The reason he constantly puts you down is a form of manipulation that gets you to question your own self worth and blame yourself for his anger, while also making him your only resource ('saviour') to not be alone forever. Do you think it might benefit YOU to go to a session or two and bring it up? "[therapist], I wonder if you can give us some suggestions on how to navigate Bob and me having conversations without negative talk or self-deprecating remarks - from my perspective it comes up in about 90% of our conversations, where Bob calls himself My girlfriend [f25] constantly gives me [28m] "constructive criticism". I feel so defeated and it My girlfriend randomly insults me then says she was joking . boyfriend keeps abusing me and I refuse to leave the toxic/abusive relationship. I hope that he is working on this in counselling. Things just “clicked” pretty early on, and we got serious fast (we’ve already started basically living together, made plans for her to move with me after I graduate grad school this summer, etc). for example today there is a birthday & they mentioned just a I know it’s stressful but why am I being treated like I did something. Members Online • cheeseishorrible. " Usually that will help me start to calm down. Or overreacting to things. Some background information: Me a [21M] and girlfriend a [23F] have been dating for about 6 months. My (36F) girlfriend (28F) makes plans with me and then falls asleep or forgets or agrees to go into work or just gets too distracted and moves on. Also, this type of behavior is not often an isolated thing and is one of the warning signs you might be in an abusive relationship. It's like people can smell the weakness on me and are always trying to use me to put down so they can prop themselves up. That started later than I was allowed to stay with my girlfriend. Sometimes they are rational and othertimes they are out of the blue. Get app Get the Reddit app Log In Log in to Reddit. TL;DR: my (22m) girlfriend (22f) expects me to be there for her 24/7 and doesn’t see how sensitive she is acting. I (20M) recently moved in with my boyfriend (24M) of a year and a half and I hate it, I constantly clean up after him and he calls me lazy all the time just because I haven't found a job yet although I have been looking every single I hate when my girlfriend 22[f] constantly of four months constantly asks me 28[m] “so, what are you doing?” all day or “whatcha you up to”, is it normal? Relationships Especially when I’m not doing anything particularly So I’ve Posted by u/nmomthrowaway1 - 5 votes and 5 comments 296 votes, 55 comments. ” Name your feelings—beforehand, jot down some Today I discuss Neil’s question: Why Does My Girlfriend Keep Putting Herself down? It’s Driving me Crazy! Neil is tired of his girlfriend continually pointing out her flaws and UPDATE: I've just discovered that my (M29)'s girlfriend (F27)'s family is putting me down in front of her (and me). Still my thoughts consumed me until eventually he snapped and I am so very glad he did. Archived post. Most would be proactive. When we started dating she would occasionally wrestle me as a joke and usually she would win due to her technical ability. Expand user menu Open settings menu. rlpzwpwbslhayehvffhyzcaxlhrzreuimelkbfwfkrflxlryciabi