My boyfriend calls me selfish A caring partner would never exploit vulnerabilities based on your painful history with a parent. and also to point out that she is the selfish one; you told her it would make you happy and that you’re celebrating yourself, a good partner would be extremely happy for you Me and my boyfriend have been together almost 5 months. Perhaps the cheating partner felt their We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. Regularly calling and texting and making plans with me. Last year during a dispute with my old roommate she called me condescending. You’re mad, sad, happy, or cheerful; it doesn’t matter to him. My boyfriend keeps finding ways to call me selfish and be very nit picky. It is extremely unlikely he will change. just based on that alone, she seems very controlling and insecure. My husband does none of this and has never done this. And these past 18 months has been a journey of managing symptoms/learning how to function with impaired cognition. Hello everyone! It's been a crazy few weeks or however long it's been, and I thought that now is a great time for an update! Today I bought us lunch. This is not the case when it's the other way around. My family have told me I'm notoriously selfish. I just feel like that was not my responsibility at all! Fast forward to today. " I know we all show grief in different ways but I don’t thinking dismissing others grief and going out with friends is a way of expressing grief. 101 votes, 43 comments. He bought them. Sometimes he can go a whole week without calling me an idiot but it always comes back to that. Listen To Your Partner. I mean he is in the hospital by my side at 1030pm, maybe I am being ungrateful. My partner never calls me lazy. Hans and Stephen have also recently invited friends, who my bf wants to befriend as well. Whenever I buy snacks for myself they call me selfish for having it in my room and “hiding He is in this rebound for a very selfish reason. (I think he might be autistic and that might explain some things) TLDR at the I called my partner ‘selfish’ an ‘idiot’ ‘unreliable’ and ‘useless’ in response to his forgetfulness. The gifts didn't mean they cared about me at the end of the day. i just got off the phone with my dad, he told me “you just want me to be below you because you think you’re so precious. He told me that if he was being selfish and whiny he would want me to tell him. I don't understand how. Since I also have my own expenses to cover, I helped him with part of his debt even though I really didn't want to. I just wanna start by saying he really is a great boyfriend and when I bring things up that bothers me he really does try to fix it . I'm so confused and I Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. This threw me for a loop and I don’t know how to respond. I asked my boyfriend what days he had off next month because I wanted to go out for a bottomless brunch with my friends. He dismisses your feelings. ) He exploded, calling me an insanely selfish person who only thinks about myself. This behavior can manifest in various ways, such as d Below, experts share the signs that indicate you’re probably the selfish one in your relationship. I am 5'2. TDLR: I feel like my BF fished me in with love bombing and now has become a boring, inattentive shell for a person who only cares about himself, He doesn't sound "nice". He called me selfish and said I turned my back on my baby to text my parents, which I wasn't doing. I hate labels, because it has negative impact on my behavior & feelings and I sabotage myself. Then today the whole day he ignored me and only replied midnight after me sending him tons of messages. My husband (30 M) calls me (30 F) selfish. My husband has never called me straight up selfish but I have had conversations with him that he absolutely needs to remind me of things. you know I you certainly hit the nail on the head. Title says it all. Tags. I will say congratulations and smile at you, but I know other people's success doesn't make me feel any happier. I might be happy that my sister found a bf, but only because I have a fun time when they are together. I just care about how people view me. I make sure my boyfriend is ok for the day, has money for gas or food. This can only mean one thing: Personal benefit for me is a good thing; personal benefit for yourself is not. This time though I don't know if I was being selfish, in my opinion not, but my boyfriend very much still thinks so. i was a huge party girl and he kind of I've been in a relationship for five years and over the past few months, my boyfriend has called me horrible names at least 20-30 times a day. (For example, instead of saying “You didn’t ask me about my day,” try “I feel hurt that you don’t check in with me. 3M subscribers in the teenagers community. I went to my room and cried out of frustration. So I was saying that for someone who can buy the ring with less than 1 month's salary it seems ok to me given that it's a one time occasion. My dad thinks that this generation is too individualistic, and is therefore selfish. they cut me off right there and turned around and aggressively said,”well i think you At this point she got really angry with me, but the crux of it is she called me selfish because I cared more about defending myself than about why she was upset. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. When we first started dating, I weighed 180 and was morbidly obese and struggling with an eating disorder, and he told me he loved me when I was that weight, and he tells me that now. When I realised he was PURPOSEFULLY setting his alarms to sleep through I called him selfish and he started swearing at me about how I’m overreacting or whatever. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. My ex was like this with sex and it just got worse and worse and worse. Email *. Doesn’t matter if he says it out of anger, or if he’s kidding, the first thing he always goes to is calling me an idiot or stupid. He calls me selfish, says I should wait until he can afford to go in a year(s) and then nothing ever happens. What was considered selfish to him that was done by me was the fact that I made him aware of this and didn’t take his feelings into consideration cause he was worried about me my boyfriend and i are growing as well (he's 22 i'm 19) so it's okay. As soon as I walked outside to get set up my son calls me back in because my husband needs me. “You'll Regret Leaving Me” To clarify, atm neither me nor my partner are working, but most people we know earn more than 5k a month and my bf constantly gets job offers in the 8k/month range. We haven't spoken in a day. Selfishness can changed by practicing Selfish behavior erodes trust, empathy, and emotional intimacy, leading to resentment and unhappiness. I guess my baby started crying and wanted to eat, but I still didn't feel ready to come out because my boyfriend was annoying me while I was trying to calm down. Their willingness to fight dirty reveals their poor character. Many times, I have been called selfish just because I didn't agree with their views. Anytime he calls me selfish when we fight, I also remind him that things fall apart when he refuses to listen to me. A good friend of mine has planned a weekend trip to a snowy state in the mountains and sent out invites in My partner calls me selfish all the time. My fortune cookie said: "You will benefit from a friends success" My bf said "It said friend because the cookie knows you are selfish with money. My 22f boyfriend 31m told me that I'm being selfish for not wanting to have sex. ” Maybe I’m overreacting, but I was really offended that he called me selfish. If I'm busy, or just enjoying my wind down time before she gets home, I just tell her that if there isn't anything urgent to communicate, I'm going to get off the phone and talk to her when she gets It hurts so much. He brought the baby to me and said” can you give me a break, I have been sick for 2 days and now I just want to play some games. I don't want to be with someone who doesn't want to help me. After everything you have done for his daughter, I think he is being very selfish. Earlier today my husband snapped at me because I did not put the scissors back in the spot he thought they should be in. I called his method stupid and he called me stupid for not understanding why he does it and that it’s worked many times how he wanted it to (again, I still don’t understand the purpose so maybe I’m being stupid idk) I wanted milk last night, my husband told me no. true but anyway i (18f) have a bf (19m) and we’ve been dating for like 2 years by now. I brought it up with my partner that I wish he would wanna spend more time with me after mini golf yesterday. in relationships i ALWAYS believe in compromise however my boyfriend makes some selfish decisions sometimes. I live with my parents and although have my own bills to pay, including credit cards debt, student loans, car etc, I would still contribute to our relationship and pay for movies, groceries, gifts etc. You should not call him "selfish boyfriend", but "ex-boyfriend". I know that my behavior made you feel stifled, and I don't want that. He is name calling/putting me down and I asked him to stop. We have been together over 3 years and have an apartment together. Edit: clarifying quick that I was just a hand massage, not hand j*b - so no cheating on my end - not justifying it just wanted to clarify in case there was confusion He then told me that to him these words don't really mean as much as they do to me, the way he grew up it was normal to talk in that way and that he was just being blunt in calling me selfish and I should just take that as an opportunity to self-reflect. Advice Received I (20F) have been dating my partner (28M) He sounds like a selfish jerk who treats you like you are a sex worker. That due to the way my brain is, I will not remember things unless it’s written down or something like that. If you don't already have a plan, ask the other person how you can make amends. Now if you do it like 10 times a day, okay, but sometimes we are just in bad moods. Taylor Alexis Heady. He called me while he's driving and few minutes later, he missed the exit and blamed it on me and started cursing me out. 5 and 150lbs. I wonder, My boyfriend (29M) reaction to a gift I (26f) bought him. He basically insults you in front of others, just for a few [26/f] My boyfriend (36/m) called me an asshole during our fight this morning. We had multiple arguments because every time I said I didn't want to give any money, he would call me insensitive and make me feel i’m selfish. This has been something that’s always bothered me, just definitely bothering more due to quarantine. But he says I don't care. Example 1: I invited him to my company holiday party. Talk to him. that’s F/U wouldn’t you My Boyfriend Keeps Joking About Getting Me Pregnant: Here's Why! January 18, 2022. And to think the only person who has ever called me a prude in my life is my own Fucking boyfriend. The fact that he allowed himself to have space for his emotions and explanations later but then wouldn’t let you (no crying, the gaslighting comments) speaks worlds about his feelings about where the power lies in this relationship. 1. We'd like to take this time to remind users that: We do not allow any type of am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors. It is worse when he does that in front of other people. How the hell am I being selfish? My gf literally calls me every day at 530 when she leaves work and has to tell me everything that happened to her, Wanting time to decompress isn’t selfish, and it will not kill your gf to not tell you all about her day right away. Posted by u/jas876 - 2 votes and 9 comments Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Overall, my boyfriend is a nice guy and we love each other. He got really mad and called me selfish. Sure, he asks me for help sometimes - but ONLY if he’s sure that I want to, have the time and energy. ” and then my mom ALWAYS calls me selfish. I’m demanding that you do something for my sake on the assumption that personal benefit is always wrong. When she gets a new BF, she becomes unrecognizable. The next morning my phone was blown up with fb messages and calls from friends and family, My sister had gone on fb after I hung up on her and she went and bitched on fb about me, She went on about how I wouldn't let her being a mom and how I had 4 kids while not being a nice sister and give her a baby, I was apparently being selfish. My boyfriend also has ocd, depression and autism and he would never, EVER treat me like this. She’s dated guys who despise kids or dislike me or my sister specifically. Posted by u/ThrowRA_Box8806 - No votes and 2 comments Posted by u/User52324 - 1 vote and 3 comments It's not fair given the ,e and my dad are on great terms. In fact, he just wants you to feel whatever he’s feeling. r/teenagers is the biggest community forum run by teenagers for teenagers. 85 votes, 51 comments. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! In my mind, if he approached me about wanting to take a trip somewhere and I didn't want to go, I'd still encourage him to have that experience and go alone if he was comfortable. He usually does it in response to a minor argument. He feels insulted when I say this, and things escalate. I will ask if you have any pets, but I really don't care about the answer. she agreed, And to call me a fucking prude makes you sound like a stereotypical asshole high school jock. I do it my husband does it, I have done it to my best friend, my Mom, they do it to me. Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. MGTOW, etc. There are plenty of evil, I’m 21 F and my boyfriend is 27 M. if you come to visit me, i’ll be fine. Tldr; bf seems to value pretty much everything above me, he won’t let us break up as he claims he loves me too much however when it comes to showing some care he fails every time and leads to calling me crazy, selfish among other insults. Your feelings will be hurt by the conversation you want to have, he doesn't want to be the one who hurts them. My mom I just joined the group and have been reading as much as I can. He has yelled at me and cussed at me, but calling me names was out of the question. I only care about myself. I adore him, but I detest the way he asks me to sacrifice. So, you are not of what’s going on with this man. This action may make me the asshole as we’re only human and are allowed to forget, I’m just wondering to what extent. I said we shouldn't go because of money and my paper. He repeatedly talked over me at dinner with my coworkers, at one point leaning over me to talk to someone and physically forcing me out of the conversation. 7. For a normal person, probably not. Update: we spoke on the phone. That's not me. I joked I should get rid of all the cows milk in the house to avoid temptation (I’m obviously not going to take my almost 2 year olds milk away forreal), and my husbands first response was to call me selfish (not in a joking way). My mom always told me to remember that having no partner is better than having a bad partner. There were multiple issues that I took issue with. playing video games over helping me move a couch when I ask him for help the day I moved, My boyfriend or girlfriend cheated on me, should I had become emotionally unavailable to him and when something good or bad happened in my life, I called my friends Perhaps some people just cheat to cheat with no regard for the other's feelings. In that case, it's selfish. Every shot my son starts pointing the gun at my daughter's face to turn around. Work Toward Your Own Happiness. My boyfriend and I have been together about 2 years and have lived together for 1 year. I'm trying to pre-plan since i wanted to drink on this day and I am bf'ing so wanted to express beforehand. My boyfriend is 6'0 and 122lbs. This is different from narcissism, which is more entrenched. 3 months ago. i'm selfish sometimes but not in relationships. "I'm a lover This weekend my boyfriend left me again saying it’s my entire fault I should have taken an upper hand to my son and taken all his . Strike one. We were playing Scrabble, but I kept winning after four games. He said things like I am so selfish and only think about my needs and that I'm so ungrateful. It's hurtful and absolutely disgusting that you don't respect me or my body enough to respect my boundaries. When we got home he just reached over and said "let me have some of your egg. My boyfriend of 5 years (27M) doesn’t let me forget it. I did rebuttal a little bit, but mostly just to fire at her boyfriend when she was talking about mine. Now, I need your advice, dear Bright Side team and readers. It’s really the only bigger issue we have in this relationship, the rest just being minor disagreements or arguments sometimes. My boyfriend and I got into an argument this morning about how down I've been in the last two weeks due to a lot of work stress. " She rolled her eyes and told me to "stop being dramatic " and when I went home she texted me "can you say sorry for embarrassing me infront of my friends?" Me 25F and my boyfriend 29M have been in a relationship for 3 years. She screamed at me on Christmas day causing me to go in to a spiral and go home away. My husband called him on the phone the night before pinning all his discontentment on your son. I stayed in these relationships for ages because I conflated this seeking out behaviour with genuine interest. My boyfriend wants to call me at 4:30 as I am walking out the door. 1) They ignore your boundaries. Let's say you're arguing i cant say how I would handle it. Anyway, today was one of those days where I came downstairs and started cooking and he’s on the couch scrolling through insta so I asked him to get off his phone and help which he did (he’s not one of those guys who doesn’t do shit I just hate being a mom who has to ask). She looked right at me but didn't seem to care. He thinks I’m selfish/victimizing myself for doing so. I don’t see how I’m being an asshole or how I’m selfish. It kinda led to an argument and in the end I realized how much of a selfish, immature fvck I am and admitted that I was in the wrong and he also called me selfish for it and said I just want the joy from I had the same problem with my (ex)girlfriend. It has happened time and time again since my parents divorced when I was 8. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. You can also subscribe without commenting. Me and my boyfriend have been together for 3 years. I need to go to the office for the first 2 days and can spend the remaining day doing paperwork at home. I’m starting to worry I was too harsh. And at the end of the day it was meaningless. " And just grabbed my salad and dumped out what he wanted cause he didn't like his enough that day. I also have a school paper that I thought wouldn't take a long time to do and I was wrong, so I brought that up too. He wants to hurt you. Whenever he pops back into my messages my initial instinct is to not answer him and then I feel guilty and reply. He then asked me to put his $1,500 medical bill on my credit card which I explicitly refused to do. g. 8. month ago. The signs of a toxic family environment. . 5 years ago and does not have many friends who live here (Hans and Stephen live in his home country), so he has been feeling lonely and wants to make friends. I'm super happy my sister in law is having another baby, I'm so excited to meet the baby (I met my nephew when he was 3 so I'm excited to meet this nephew as a newborn) but I'm still super excited for when it'll be our turn. Recognizing these signs allows for open communication and setting boundaries, fostering a balanced partnership. ” That he was going to only do things for him now. TLDR: I felt brushed off by my boyfriend during a call, then he called me selfish and an asshole during the disagreement. i was hanging out with my vegan friend and i cooked us a vegan dinner (i’m not vegan). When I first met my boyfriend(22/m) It’s an extremely selfish mindset, If my bf called me an airhead I’d day “thanks dickhead” and move on lol. I ordered in two salads to go from a restaurant one he liked one I liked. I looked at my girlfriend and called her a "selfish bitch. Am I being selfish? My best friend called me selfish . I Stumbled Upon a Secret Letter Revealing Alarming Details About My Boyfriend. It's fair to say they called me selfish because I wasn't bending over backwards to do their every wish, so I cut them off and am now with much more supporting people. Tl;dr my bf eats all my food and calls me stingy when I get upset over it My bf and I have been living together for over 6 months and this is a problem we’ve had from the beginning. Me being selfish, is a common argument from him. Relationships. He could be a sociopath, or maybe he's just broken and completely selfish. I asked her if her grandmother was okay and her friends just laughed. It wasn’t that she said anything all that mean, but when you feel safe and comfortable and then someone hits you in Be encouraged if your partner frustrates you by showing selfishness. I refused & uncovered a shocking family secret that changed I said no he wasn’t, and he admitted he is starting to feel jealous. Today, 9 Ways to Understand and Manage Selfish People By Gustavo Richards, in Relationships, Wednesday at 07:40 PM. The other day, we argued so badly that he smashed his phone. 5 yrs) He yelled at me for being too self-centered and focused on medical school, and how things are happening out side of “my world”. Engin Akyurt / Charles Deluvio via Unsplash. And when I did he said “I WAS BEING SELFISH” and I wasn’t thinking about him? I was like what the? Currently he’s living his life to the fullest and enjoying every moment. When I hurt someone I love I feel guilt and apologize and make it up to them. Selfish just like you said. [UPDATE] I want to leave my boyfriend of 8 years because of no proposal, but my friends and family are calling me selfish and are threatening to tell him . Starting this off to say that my boyfriend having friends isn't the issue here, it's the disproportionate amount of time he spends with them compared to me. 5 years called me [24, F] dumb When I need support, half the time he is not there and he prefers being selfish (at least according to my perception e. Your boundaries act as your own individual set of rules. I asked a friend about it and he denied me being condescending but didn't deny me being self centred. I blew up and said him treating me like he’s my parole officer over something that was extremely upsetting for me was ridiculous and that he’s selfish for making it all about him. When I went home and called my bf, he wanted me to show him my body so that he could m*asturbate but I said I wasn’t in the mood and was upset over the shooting (as well as the aggressive patient). I do all the cleaning in our apartment and he never helps. Therapists think I have PTSD as well from being at home. Just wanted to start off by saying thank you everyone for the post I made 2-3 months ago, everyone helped me a lot; however, I know this is selfish but we already had a trip planned out where we booked flights, hotels, My bf, has called me a dumb bi*** whenever he is mad at me, tells me he makes more money than me, Boyfriend calling me selfish and attention seeking? Personal issues So this is the back story; me (f20) and my boyfriend My boyfriend proceeded to call me selfish and tell me I'm attention seeking for wanting support during this time. My boyfriend and I broke up and in anger during the break up he told me I was self centred. You chose to go early knowing what would happen. Growing up, if I wanted to be loved, I had to do the right things (according to my mom and stepdad) and one of those things was not be 'selfish', which to them meant doing absolutely ANYTHING for myself. For instance, if he would rather be alone playing video games than with you, this is one of the signs of a selfish boyfriend. 1 8 months ago. but there is something very disturbing about her calling you selfish for wanting to take a trip on your own. after dinner, they started going off on a rant about how eating meat is so unethical and immoral. i responded with “i don’t see a problem with eating meat-“. Do I bear any responsibility? Her boyfriend who, doesn't go on fb that much was looking through posts yesterday to find all this drama, He called me and explained he, Had no Idea my sister even asked me, and even brought up finding a surrogacy with her but she always complained it was to much, and also brought up adoption a lot and she always said "maybe". Yeah it seems like he outting this on himself. I make sure our son is up and take him to school. I am working part time now, 3 days a week. When he came home, he acted extremely annoyed with me and called me selfish for “making him buy food when I could have just cooked for us. However, when he drinks (especially when he has 3+ drinks, he gets vicious (verbally). Be prepared for a lot of excuses for why he hasn’t responded to your texts or calls. My boyfriend of 2 years (19M) has been criticizing me (19F) and calling me selfish because I want to move back to Toronto for my second year of uni. I know this sounds ridiculous over a bag of popcorn but it’s really about being called selfish. When we went to the mountains for our birthday, I paid for everything. It could have been brewing for a She ended her rant calling me selfish, and I just sat there crying silently. Has he ever called me fat, even But apparently narcissist don't feel for others. In the act of telling you not to be selfish, I’m requesting or demanding that you do something for me. You are the one being selfish. But no curiosity about who I am and what makes me tick. My opting for sleep over exhaustion is selfish. example, he doesn't like to party. Yet when my siblings' tutor agreed with me, my mom saved face by nodding along with the tutor. 5. TLDR; I broke my bf’s trust and we are trying to repair things. Either way, he's going to ruin your life if you stay with him. Daring to think differently from them and wanting to choose my own happiness. We are currently long distance, and have not seen eachother since Corona got really bad. And the I’m going to be brutally honest. They gave me all kinds of gifts, but then they would back out of plans, not be available if I called, "lose track of time" and show up 2-3 hours late. if you don’t, i’ll be fine. dd is currently 3 weeks old but by the time I was planning this brunch she will be 6 weeks and hopefully we would have introduced My Boyfriend Calls Me Names Jokingly (7 Possible Reasons Why) By Nirajana Mukherjee • LAST UPDATED May Your boyfriend is so selfish that he does not think twice before dehumanizing you by calling you names. like sometimes when he does something that’s hurtful to me i close up and feel upset and he starts to get frustrated because i’m sad and asks what’s wrong in a frustrated tone and when he does this i don’t feel like telling him what’s that bc he already sounds frustrated so he gets mad hi mom, hi dad today was kind of a big shock for me. She would only call me by my first name. My Wife Wants to Undergo IVF and Calls Me Selfish for Wanting My DNA for Our Kid. If you communicate your reasonable desires to your lover and they refuse you for selfish reasons, that is a big red flag. Whenever my boyfriend(20m) gets angry he calls me(19f) things along the lines of bitch/cunt/idiot and it really hurts my feelings, but he will act so righteous about it. I mean, you also have to Boyfriend [23 M] of 2. Taylor Alexis Heady Published: November 4, 2024. For the first year, the relationship was good, but over the last 6-8 months, a serious issue has come up. for YTA for calling your boyfriend selfish for not wanting to talk about your weight. ”) This focuses on the impact of your partner’s behavior, rather 414 votes, 270 comments. This is abusive. Posted by u/LEINA_IK - No votes and no comments Lots of people can be startled and don’t respond by calling their partner a stupid bitch. Name *. " For reference when we went Austin, I paid for everything. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: I think I might be TA because I called my boyfriend “selfish,” which is a really loaded word, and I feel awful about it. You chose to wake up at 6am to go with her. It’s not nice but it happens. Family & kids. 8 months I Immediately Called the Police. Notify me of followup comments via e-mail. He's fuming and is insisting I'm being innconsiderate and projecting on him when I called him selfish. These men become her everything. It sounds like the inattentive part of ADHD is being misconstrued as selfish. I got jealous and let that control my actions, but I plan to control my actions in the future. I have never complained about not having too much money. We will make fun of my incredible habit of getting halfway through a task and them leaving in the halfway phase because I forgot it existed entirely or the fact that my therapist had to teach me how to clean because otherwise I turn into a tornado of only doing things half way. If he only helps you "sporadically" he isn't even meeting the bar, and the bar is low. I left my baby with him. You are not fat and he is wrong to call you such things. For context, my bf moved here 1. 68 votes, 26 comments. So, it’s been two weeks since the Great Family Drama, and here’s where we’re at: my Mom is giving me the silent treatment, and my sister is demanding an apology (spoiler alert: she’s not getting one because I’m convinced I was 100% in the right). Please make sure you read our rules here. “One of the best reasons to be in an Here are some helpful steps to take: 1. I was literally crying my eyes out, trying to de-stress. We haven’t spoken since, but he looks miserable. I wanted more than anything for her to call me any pet name even though I told her how much it would mean to me if she would. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole: Im think I could be the asshole for calling my boyfriend an insult (selfish) was crossing the line. When he was away on business, For me, yes. We shoot a few times, my daughter is with us. If you’re dealing with a selfish partner, chances are you’ve gotten used to Not only are you not selfish, your boyfriend sounds like a manipulative douche. Boundaries are what help healthy relationships to function. I give him 3 chances, he still does it. "for calling my boyfriend selfish" You are doing this all wrong. 2. He can say 12 nasty things to me and if I say one single thing in my defense or finally lose my cool and just tell him to please “f--k off and leave me alone,” he accuses me of being abusive. She doesn't mean it as an insult. we’re both college kids. He yelled at me for calling him selfish although it's our wedding not just mine and said that I clearly don't give a hoot if he's uncomfortable then walked out. I don't think I would like a bunch of "equality" seeking feminists calling me a chauvinist pig for propagating misogynistic traditions, Two weeks ago my friend and I had a "sleepover" at her house and she caught me texting my boyfriend on my phone, she asked me who he was, I told him he is my boyfriend and she laughed, and asked me since when I had a boyfriend, I didn't want to give her too much details about my relationship, I just told her we date for 6 months and I talked about something else, Context: Me:female 25 Him:male 2r 2 years and 3 moths of relationship. Top Posts Otherwise, I wasn't going to be able to relax enough to sleep or do anything at all. Why does he do that? What should I do? Now I have depression stopping me from leaving my bed and anxiety about failing anything and leaving the house. I always try to calm him down, keep us happy, keep the situation good, but he always goes back to calling me stupid. When we talk about a selfish person, we might call them self-centred (preoccupied with oneself and one’s affairs), self-serving (having concern for one’s own welfare and interests before those Background: My boyfriend and I have been together almost two years (I am 26 and he is 32). One way to tell the difference between a rude comment and one that's toxic and abusive, is if your partner says it in a way that's intended to hurt or manipulate you. That said, it’s you’re feelings and you have the right to be upset if you feel that way. I want things to be okay again. Five hours later, he won't apologize for it. 1-1-Influencer Reveals Dramatic My perspectives are below, feel free to read his or mine first. First off, depending on your partner, it may be a big deal that they're bringing this up. as i did high school tennis all 4 years (varsity mvp lol) and she had played tennis before, i suggested tennis. 208K subscribers in the AskWomenOver30 community. I really didn’t want to argue with them. He called me selfish, said I was inconsiderate for not planning anything, and said I have “zero empathy for anyone other than (myself). as long as he's willing to give you the chance to work on it. Partners are partners. And that’s how the next half hour goes basically, until the parents leave, mad, and the dad calls me a selfish cow. BF calling me selfish . Posted by u/Glittering_Mud_9383 - 30 votes and 36 comments That’s when he called me and “ungrateful little shit”. I was placed with her again after my 4 hour shift at the ER (worked a total of 12hours). He genuinely wants me to take care of myself first and respects my time. I know I'm supposed to go no contact with him but a few days after I left (literally ran for my life a year ago) I spoke to him and told him I'd always be here for him. You both sound like immature children. So I let her proceed to judge me and talk shit about my boyfriend in OUR apartment for hours while he was in the other room gaming with his friends. Fingered My (31M) Ass Then Called Me “Gay” For Liking It. I was so pissed off about it and told him to never call me that again, but he said that me reacting that way was making this whole thing blow out of proportion. It Below, experts offer seven tips for responding to a selfish partner. Continue browsing in r/relationship_advice. but the WACKED part is he keeps calling me by my sisters name. When his mum slags me off, sometimes comes on dates with us, treats my boyfriend like her boyfriend and tries to cut me out he always defends her and calls me rude for saying I don’t feel welcome because of how much she doesn’t like me. but anyway, he has a sister (14f) who’s just about graduating 8th grade. I am a selfish brat. Note when your partner uses your unresolved wounds against you rather than Handle conflicts respectfully. Make his wish come true. My boyfriend (29, m) and I (24, f) Boyfriend called me ugly, am I being too sensitive by taking it to heart? because he wants to be. Welcome to r/relationship_advice. He sounds selfish. Woman Calls Boyfriend ‘Selfish’ for Eating Dumplings Behind Her Back. My boyfriend is 7 years older and makes over 100k a year. Our subreddit is primarily for Gosh no, I don't think you're selfish at all. Panda Express. You expect your partner to listen to you vent but you don’t offer the same in return. Take note if your partner turns away during life’s sh*ttiest moments, like when you’re having a health problem, family issue, financial struggle, or even a slightly annoying day at work. But after I started doing that, he have been getting mad and started calling me selfish. My gf (22F) called me (27M) selfish and inconsiderate because she said I don't let her win in Scrabble. My [27F] boyfriend [29M] just called me fat even though I’m 5’2” and weigh 120 pounds. every time i get upset by something my bf does he switches it around to me and makes me feel bad. I gave him time he needs, he just calls me anytime he wants even if it's 4am in my place. It was a tough breakup for both of us, but we eventually moved on. My sister started dating my ex-boyfriend behind my back & then asked me to be her maid. I finally moved out in 2020 and I started to try to get on with my life. I am 30 (f) and my partner 35 (m) (dating for a 1. subscribers . For example: "I'm so sorry that I was selfish about the time we were spending together. My prioritizing sleep over his blowjob is selfish. Welcome to AskWomenOver30, an inclusive Reddit community where people can I (27F) dated my ex-boyfriend (28M) for about three years before we broke up due to incompatible life goals. A past BF called my sister a bitch to her face when she was just 13, and my mom blamed her. So I walk back in, give him the necessary information, and walk back outside. Not once has my partner ever made me feel like a burden or made me feel terrible for being selfish about my my health over these two years. I've kept this to myself for a while since I thought feeling this way made me selfish but it's really messing with my head and I need to rant about it. A selfish partner is someone who consistently prioritizes their own needs and desires over yours, often at the expense of your happiness and well-being. Recently, I found out through social media that he's getting married to someone else, just a year after our breakup. but you will be sad in the long run, you will wish you had a relationship with me. I hate it when he calls me names “bitch” “selfish ass bitch” “motherfucker” and now “ungrateful little shit”. Posted by u/Consistent_Winner_48 - 1 vote and 1 comment Not ending my life but just not being anywhere anymore. Some of you guys asked why my boyfriend calls me psychopath and selfish, I did not do anything to him. My wife does something similar, she can't sit through her commute home from work without calling me to talk about things I know she'll just repeat to me when she's home anyway. Did you not ask your husband indications or examples of your selfishness? If you're planning on putting together a list from Reddit of what people think are selfish traits and going back to your Today we were supposed to go and I said maybe not because we would spend a lot of money and he said he was worried about money. We’ve been living together for almost a year . My partner starts a fight and calls me crazy every time I tell him how I feel . He called me selfish, I was hurt and let him know as much. I'm sure he would prefer you to be lighter, but there's no safe way for him to say that. And similarly, he helps me with my struggles when he has the energy and time. Then just after my 30th birthday, I got the diagnosis of inoperable Glioma. He has never said anything like that to me before. To me it shows protection and it's a sign of care, but he said that it's his #1 life principle and he won't break it, not even for me. He’s called me a waste of time, often threatens to ends things, and says he doesn’t care about me etc. I just need to know what I should do at this point. My boyfriend urged me to tell him since I was so quiet. I’m so flabbergasted that I just sort of put up with it, but I TLDR My boyfriend offered/”gave” my Hamilton tickets to his troubled sister without my knowledge and now he and his parents are massively She ended up pushing and kicking my coworker. My BF acts like I don’t deserve that I earn more than him, repeatedly tricking me into paying for his and his friends' meals, so he’s furious I sneak out In my case(s) what was confusing was that these people would seek me out constantly. Trust me, girl, someone else would always choose you. me and her have been getting closer, and she asked me about high school sports. “you think the world revolves around you, you just want me to be your 13. dkat zwkgo lxdviuru jxnkr jfvsw ame xka jrpoo dbbjw efr