Leaving my kids reddit. 34 and I'm back to square one living in my mother's house.

Leaving my kids reddit So, when I did not receive an inheritence, but my siblings did, I was not surprised and I said nothing. Personally I think 10 is too young to leave however I don't know the kids. My mom, not so much, poor investments, rash, and in debt. Once I made that connection, it really, really ate at me, b/c as I watched my eldest grow up, then add 3 more kids, I was able to connect with what I'd feel if I only saw my kids once a year. My new girlfriend is a younger version of my wife, but I'm too wrapped up in myself to stop telling myself that it has nothing to do with 'falling out of love' with my wife, and understanding that cheaters cheat, and it's pretty predictable that this second marriage will end in infidelity and leave me and any offspring poorer, even more i had to leave my dog to go to rehab for 9 months, a couple months after i got her. It's a permanent midset of being the most important person in the room, only her needs matter, and prioritizing small personal things (food preferences) over big important shared things (participation in your son's wedding). She can stay away but I need my kids back home. that on it's own with a 7% avg growth rate will reach 200k by the end of that time, which if left alone will become 1. Basically, in most of the country, there is no specific legal age at which a child can be left alone (Manitoba and New Brunswick 12, Ontario 16,) and if a complaint of neglect for leaving a child alone is brought, the burden of proof is for Child Protection to prove neglect, and the judge will consider multiple factors including the specific Suddenly, I don't feel able to go anymore I start to cry. We are lucky that both grandmothers enjoy spending time with the kids. My parents didn't have much but taught me a great work ethic and I want my kids to have the same drive to succeed. Moms are one thing all kids understand, even if they don't have one themselves. I feel like the only thing holding me back (from leaving him) is not seeing my kids half the time. I'm 31 and married. The background details: my (42F) husband (46M) and I have been married for 21 years. But I think I would be more engaged and present for the time I did have them (as I would be able to get chores/cleaning etc done the other week) and be in a better place mentally. We had a tradition where they’d come over and we’d do presents. She deserves to be free now. I was 14 when he was born. We use the episode so much at our house, it’s a great explainer for kids. ***Please use a clear title for your question: clear titles get clear answers. About 95% of the time we can leave places without any fighting or yelling. Kind and earned a lot more money, I knew he would have my back always. I know it will be painful, I can't imagine dealing with this. My toddlers don’t quite get it yet, but my big kid does and and helps take on the sheepdog role. Again I'm frozen, nice start to rock myself. I plan to keep enough for the time I have left, and leave my wife a good cash amount. Sometimes I would even tell her to let me finish my chore (like dishes) she got to around 1. Subreddit Announcement Right now, about 65-70 percent of my saving are now gone. They took 2 weeks off as well having a holiday without us. You did it knowingly and here you'd be prosecuted for neglect for that. we didn’t even get to bond”. I went in for about two ho The situation with the kids doesn't have to be this way. I am basically a live-in Nanny for them and I live in their house rent free because I don't have a job. Not wealthy. Ducking out for a few groceries and leaving a 10-year-old home for under an hour doesn’t seem too bad—if, in the parent’s judgment, the child won’t burn the house down or let a stranger in or something like that. I’ve never been away from either kid before. i’m not asking for advice, and i’m not going to change my mind. He had so little to do with his own father and his kids that he had no idea they were visiting their grandfather regularly. true. The kids know each other and are friends at school in addition to frequent play dates. My brothers are well off and can afford to pay for their own families to go. i work about 15 hrs/week from home and have the kids full time. 100% agree. My mom still works 50+ hours a week in office so she is unable to take the time off from work though she wishes she could. TLDR; I am thinking of leaving my partner and kids. My husband and I have 5 kids (pregnant with #6) ages 11 years to 5years. Money can bring a lot if stability to your family. We're dealing with the fact that he thinks because he works longer hours than I do (50-55 hours a week compared with my 40 hours) that I should do the majority of the housework and household management. I told him that I am not his maid nor his mother. I’ve been there. You can try a "out of bounds" box for the first times - if they leave stuff on the floor, it goes in the out of bounds box and is unavailable for a few days - but you have to make them put the things in the box themselves. Posted by u/Randomusername942756 - 1 vote and 33 comments Thank you! I should have provided more context. They’re the reason I keep going. Do give your kids the option: you can AWLAYS change schools and live with me for a time. I hated how clingy the kids became and how much responsibility I had. I made plans with a this new woman to get together tonight just her and I. No. Mar 7, 2019 · I always desired more space in my marriage ― which is, in part, why I decided to leave it. I’m leaving my babies (3 years and 9 months) tomorrow morning for vacation. My mum is a highly qualified early childhood educator who will be helping my husband with the kids. The only people I'll leave them with are my Mum and their Dad. The trust is set up to take the (financial) place of a living parent if you were to pass away so that your kids would still have something close to the financial support of two parents in their lives. I am happy. My husband will be with them while I’m gone. I, of course did not expect to receive anything (I am NC with Nmom). However, in my state it's illegal to leave children in the car with it running. My grandma came the year after so she wouldn’t be alone, and it was like a weird cloud formed. 65M after another 30 years. My mom is this kind of selfish, leaving if the food is not to her taste but not thinking about that will impact her kids. My daughter doesn't see it that way. He’s happy and smiley when I drop off and pick up. You could have had that. In my opinion it’s better to get kids used to this with a loving caregiver so it is easy on them. my fiancé and i have 2 kids together, 7 and 1. I am debating what is appropriate. So are you abandoning your children or do you intend to share custody and keep them in your life? Would strongly recommend marriage counseling in advance of this separation to help you learn to co-parent without animosity. Now everyone is gone: my parents and husband, leaving me and my 18 yo son alone, at least we have each other, thank god. For some reason the other kids have started thinking it is fun to run off while playing and leave my child out. This action could have been wrong because I haven't gone home the entire time and I wound up staying here until it was time for my kids to stay with their father for the summer. I found a great job, amazing people, bought a house and made a life. My whole view on the thing is yes, i do feel compelled to leave my kids an inheritance. Yes, I wasn't always present in their lives and, yes, my business did take priority at times, but I did my absolute damnedest to be there as much as I possibly could. In my country it is illegal to leave 2 ten year old kids home alone. Thank you. We split bills. 2: If he's abusive towards you, you should be able to get a protection order against him. They truely want me to be happy. I’m not married and I really didn’t need any more money. I turned 18 on the 17th of August st and even since before then, at like the beginning of summer my mothers bestfriend and six children age ranging from (1 years old to 13 )moved in with us, since then i have been cleaning everyday, since the house is absolutly trashed each day since there are so many kids and little parental supervision Now I'm missing my kids like crazy and she won't talk to me or allow me to speak to my kids. The parents didn’t care about anything— they always put themselves, their appearances, and their businesses first. so yes, your dog will most likely It’s only for you and your parents to decide. She wanted to create discord between my children and I. The family gathering includes me (22m), my brother (21), my sister (25), her husband (29) and their two kids, my dad, step-mom and her kids (6 and 9) aunt, uncle, my two cousins (15 and 20), grandma, and grandpa. I need my kids back in their bed. I took full advantage of that. I feel awful as she wants to stay together no matter what. Concerning the kids, ask your wife to explain her leaving to them, If she won't just tell them she decided to leave us but I am here and not leaving. You can get joint custody. Each time they've understood. Solidarity with all pan-Asian peoples. Also even if Alex was both their child as some of the other passengers assumed why would it not be ok for a mother to leave their child with the father and take the upgrade. I kind of think they respected me more for it. A place to satirize, crosspost from, poke fun at, and hold meta discussions on the never-ending ridiculous stories and creative writing exercises from AITA and AITA-adjacent subs, including classic tales of your local reddit heroes seeking validation. Fucking. Very condensed version. She wanted a reaction. 5. I didn't want to cause too much strain and said I was leaving for a while for work. My action was leaving my kids with my parents for a month to support my husband during treatment. Just a note for anyone reading this: MAKE A WILL, especially if you're partnered but unmarried and/or have difficulties w/ your family of origin. ***Your post must be a question; chat posts are not allowed. My 13-year-old (Ellie) had suggested I speak to a person that visited her school. I did just tell my ex I was leaving, I couldn't take another round of "stop acting like a child" and "grow up". But am conflicted because it’s all I know. I feel like the worst parent right now for even taking this trip. My husband tries to talk to me and asks me what is happening. I’m quite comfortable and something I wanted to do for them. I can still choose to stay but I might have to give up on many of my dreams for that. He’s a deadbeat dad who thinks being a sperm donor earns him a place of honor next to I didn't leave without goodbye. I left my then 5 year old daughter and 2 year old son. I could retire early or work a few years longer. My husband thinks I’m selfish to leave him to take care of all 6 kids while I’m off having a vacation. However, my friends/family get frustrated that I won't leave my kids with him so that I can do things on my own. What I'm seeing is this "my mental health" "my depression" etc. I'm rather 'domestic' and I can also fix a lot of items. Your bio kids would not. I wondered if it would be too devastating for my kids, who are now 4 and 9. They won't get it at first - especially if your kids are in the older side of the label - but it's important to repeat this. It's the same for all of my friends and family with elementary schoolers: sports banquets, picnics, awards ceremonies, plays. That being said, my dad ultimately became my stability. At my son's school, if a kid is being sufficiently dickish there's an ISS-style room in the front office, and the kids talk about it with fear. I'm just now starting to feel guilty about just up and leaving. It was horrible while it lasted but - it doesn't last. My husband doesn't understand my fear and thinks I just don't want to work, I do but I am afraid that the person i choose to leave my kids with, will abuse them in some type of way. Reddit has abandoned the users, the moderators, and countless people who support an ecosystem built on Reddit itself. Ok, so I (38M) have a wife (36F), and four children (ages 8-14). 34 and I'm back to square one living in my mother's house. Assure them everything will be ok. Mine is not causing problems. Despite living in a 3rd world country, my family lives well, I have my fiancee and my 2 children have our own business, children in a good school, cars of the year and I'm not trying to brag, I just want to give a little context of my life, but I want a better future for my children and I have decided in the following months to move to the My partner is great with my daughters (age 4 and 8). My kids are right around her kid's age and there have been music performances, a class open house, a piano recital, and there's an art open house next week. i had to leave her home & i was devastated. Edit: typo My experiences going back home for visits are so positive that I feel noticeably better in health the moment I step foot in town. Single. We were not living together but he asked if I could move in to help him out. My mom lived with her dad until she finished high school, my aunt eventually moved in with her mom, and they are both close to her today. Wasn't the first time I had to leave. Kids were really crushed as they moved into his house. But I think I'm a cold monster to leave my mom I have a similar situation with my ex. But I started hating it again. I'm 60yrs old and going to be collecting survivers benefits. I cry, now because it's hard for me not to go, but because it's hard for me to abandon my kids to it, above all my daughter for the moment. I’m intending to leave my kids with their dad and grandparents+aunt in my home country while I complete my training. They are 8 and 5. Every single day of my life I wished my mother would leave my father. I’m not sure how to handle this. My parents are planning a family vacation to Mexico at Christmas. my wife, june (fake name) and i are 35 years old, been together since 15 and married at 26. My MIL has kept my son since he was 12 weeks old. You can read more about it in my previous r/Marriage post. However, my children are noticing that I'm spending a lot, and started to ask questions. And I am stuck here! She is gone, at work, all day, all the time, and it is my day off again, and once again, like every other bit of free time I get, I am trapped in here, unable to do anything at all, go anywhere, have any kind of life whatsoever, nobody wants to watch my kids for me, I can't get away from them. My wife doesn't see it that way. Other countries are different. He wanted a kid, but he did not want to have a kid with just anyone. I left my ex and her children the house and moved in with my uncle. Eventually, my mom was able to make the 2 hour drive down to stay with the girls but I told her to not let Polly leave the house. I never met his first wife and as far as I know they were a happy family until an accident took her away and J 2. Your step-kids have two parents in the picture, and they still would if you passed away. My uncle is calling me irresponsible for leaving my children at home alone to go on said date. A sub for anyone to ask questions about the military. I lectured Polly about what she did and grounded her for 2 weeks. Now, we see my parents, sister, uncles, nephews, etc every 2-3 weeks. I gave her none. It will be better for all of you in tbe long run. My brother had is first child at 40 and my SIL was 35, me and her are the same age. My kids are 11,9,&5. I had told the kids goodbye. Three months ago, I discovered that he had been cheating on me pretty much the whole time. Yes! While living w my MIL when my kids were toddlers, my husband did nothing to clean up after himself. I started with quick errands, like taking the dog out just long enough to do her business. It's it's as if madness is taking a hold I grew up in a desperately unhappy household. My immediate family, who I only trust, lives far from me. She got mad at me and said that I can’t expect her to drop her plans. We don’t need to tag out too often but ever since that episode “20 minutes” is like our safe word when we’re overwhelmed. I need my kids to be able to go to their kitchen and get their snacks and The amount of men who get horrified when I go out and have fun with friends and leave my husband and child at home is obnoxious. 3 hours…it’s really hard for me to say, because at 10, my mom would leave me with my siblings (8 and 3) and go a few Edit 3: I am sick of all the comments saying I don't care about my kids. It was beyond devastating to lose them, I won’t lie. She was part of the LGBTQ center at a nearby college. Oct 13, 2024 · She Wants To Leave Her Kids With Their Other Parents For Four Months To Work On Her Masters, But Not Everyone Is On Board Because They’d Have To Pick Up The Slack. Apr 19, 2018 · I knew somebody with two children who, when the youngest was a baby, believed she would fall down dead and leave them motherless. My kids are 17(m) and 9(f). There is no official law for leaving kids in a car that is not running (like you said, gray area because the law says something like 'unless left in a dangerous situation'). When we met, he had been widowed for about three years and had to children from this previous relationship, Mark (24M) and Lisa (22F) (all fake names). It’s gonna be a difficult 9 months but I feel like this option is better than the alternative of hiring an au pair. I'm an only child and my dad is half chinese and half white. My kids have no concept of time so if we say 5 more minutes they just count to 5 and don't understand how time works yet so having them choose just 1 last thing to do helps them a lot. I don’t understand how these two can constantly leave their children. He has two children with another woman (13F) and (6M) and this woman is now pregnant again; she claims all three kids are my husband’s and he has not disputed that. My partner has 5 kids from previous relationships. She failed. I'm more social than him. My trill lesbian latinx mother gives me a hard time for not calling/visiting her enough. But my parents never made me feel bad about my choice. New baby will be 6 months old at the time of this vacation. But at my spouse's school, they get to play with kinetic sand in the principal's office for a few minutes and get sent back with stickers. But it’s brought me to the lowest mental state of my life. My advice is keep the communication there with the kids and don’t involve them in your issues with mom. Both my brother and his wife work. the alternative is to work a little bit longer, stash say 25k per kid and then let it invest over the span of 30 years. After my daughter goes to bed I would leave. I'm taking nothing other than a change of clothes, my laptop and important documents I took out of my father's office. My daughter figured out what happened on her own. I never wanted my kids to grow in a broken home or be a "weekend dad" but the alternative of me staying and our home becoming toxic wasn’t the best thing either. I cannot afford it so my parents offered to pay for me, my partner, and my two kids to go for a week. But the milk and eggs, we’re literally in a farmer’s driveway and there’s no point in unbuckling her and trying to wrangle and grab the things I need AND pay at the self serve card reader. We leave the kids with her 5 nights max. My biggest goal in life is to be nothing like my parents when it comes to my kids. the day i got home, she was so excited & she peed on the floor lol. Currently, I live with my husband, son, and my husband's parents. I spent a lot of time with my mom growing up because my old man was busy with his career as a cog in the military-industrial complex. I think I'm a horrible person for leaving her. I don't normally work from home. When his mom realized it was his mess all over the house she flipped out like he was a child and made him clean it. Some backstory: I live with my 35 year old brother and his wife and 4 kids (3 girls 1 boy and all 4 and under). Consciously or not, every kid wants their mom to put them first. I have a huge fear of leaving my children wth a babysitter and it's preventing me from starting to work. Throwaway account as family members use Reddit. I’m setting her free. I have documented everything and unfortunately, it will end up being something that I have to learn to be uncomfortable with. Day. So I stopped picking up after him too. It truly has helped my family a lot. And loved it. It took about 7 months before I realized my child isn't going to die if I leave her in the pack n play crying while I pee/rinse my stressed face, heat up my coffee, enter other normal self care things. I would like to leave or gift my kids an amount where they are comfortable or don't need to worry too much about making ends meet. I love them so much my heart is breaking and I feel like I’ve made the wrong decision. We are lucky that my MIL mostly works from home and enjoys spending any time possible with the kids. OP saw his kids twice a month until he decided to move away and see them never. My husband (31) and I (32) of 2 years have been having marital issues and are working through them. . For a long time, I wondered if I’d ever have the strength. They talked about how I could always leave my kid with them if my Husband and I ever needed a babysitter, and I immediately felt cold. And yes, I hope my kids smile and know how much I love them. Just for a while. I know my city, jobs opportunities are vast, and the quality of life is significantly better than what I have in my current city. Despite everything, I know I deserve to enjoy my life in general, but I fear the position that I will put myself, my children and, ultimately, my wife if I do leave. She is either bringing the kids (3yrs and 1yr) either over to her parents until it is their bedtime or she has her boyfriend and his kids over to “entertain” my kids. i’m tired of her criticizing everything i do, always complaining when the kids ask her for something, and just in general her bad attitude. Every. If you don't like kids why marry him? 2K votes, 270 comments. Whatever i don't use in this life should be passed down. In the past I've started around four days in advance, but I'm thinking about pushing it to a week this time. And all I literally have are my ambitions and my family. I can’t stand the idea of not having my children every day. I’m leaving our children with her too. I know you only love your older children - I don’t judge you for that, but I recommend if you leave you leave alone and work on yourself. He's been in their lives for 3 years and 90% of the time he lives with us. My sister and I have always been close, we did everything together she was literally my best friend I’m married and have three kids, whiles my sister is married and has just one child, around 2020 my sister got an opportunity to go work in canada, I was so happy for her but she had a son( who was one year old at the time) and he did not have a passport nor visa so she asked if he could live The reality is that you will sometimes leave your kid. The next day, Trevor and I were able to go home. When I was 12 I started going to summer camps (and these were really cool) for 2 weeks every summer. I’ll never get over my mom… But please consider my story, what I’ve done and where I am today. Jan 1, 2013 · Here are my two questions: Why does everyone react so negatively when I tell them that I am leaving my girls with their father? He is a very nurturing and loving father. It may or may not be possible fo I think your scenario is completely acceptable. If I could still keep a roof over my son's head, I would stay home with him in a heartbeat. She stayed with me because she didn’t want to risk leaving her children with a narcissistic sociopath but I don’t want to hurt them anymore. by Ashley Ashbee My youngest thinks his older brothers hold a great dealt of resent towards him for being my "replacement family" and me for leaving them with a mother that didn't spend child support on things like electricity or running water. The only time I leave my daughter in the car is if I have to run back into the house for something, and when I pick up our milk and eggs. Its not like it matters, i am going to be dead so there really is no reason not to do so unless your children doing something so terrible that it makes them undeserving of an inheritance. My wife would be unlikely to organise some time for herself the day I got back from an overseas trip as she might see that as selfish (she may feel she should spend it with me or that leaving the kids on me after a 24 hour flight would be bad). She's extremely supportive of me going out to the other college and in fact, has been motivating me to do so. Despite living in a 3rd world country, my family lives well, I have my fiancee and my 2 children have our own business, children in a good school, cars of the year and I'm not trying to brag, I just want to give a little context of my life, but I want a better future for my children and I have decided in the following months to move to the I'm going on vacation for a little over two weeks, leaving my one year old kids with my co-teacher and a supply teacher they know reasonably well. It's not an everyday occurrence - it's like once every two months max. It’s not fine and it sounds like you plan to go through with this which is whatever, but you should feel bad and it shouldn’t get any easier for you as long as you abandon someone you claim to love and leave them to deal with your children. My city, New York, doesn’t even have a minimum age. Forgive my bad grammer, English is not my first language. Leaving the house and telling my wife it's her job to babysit the kids 2) Because taking care of kids isn't only her responsibility Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! Do upvote interesting posts! Click Here For Our Rules and Click Here For Our FAQ. Please read Call to action - renewed protests starting on July 1st and new posts at r/ModCord or r/Save3rdPartyApps for up-to-date information. I'm 34 and starting over with no savings, retirement, or college funds for my kids because everytime I managed to arrange our lives around his behavior to keep the kids safe and keep us afloat with money to spare, he finds some way to burn it down. Nobody made any money off it and it wasn’t a sales pitch. i had those same thoughts, & i was like “she won’t remember me anymore. Kids do better with happy seperated parents than miserable together parents. My husband and I are going away for three lights and four days. 7K votes, 954 comments. In that time my parents would leave my younger sister with grandma or have her go on the camp too when she was old enough. I'm wondering when I need to start reminding them that I'm going to go. I felt like leaving my last family was like leaving the kids, who were five and two, with emotional abusers/neglectors. If you live in the US and die intestate (without a will) there are rules of succession and that could mean the parents or siblings you haven't spoken to for decades can inherit your estate while your life partner is left out in the cold. As long as they are legally over the minimum age to stay home alone, they’re fine. So, we picked a city two hours from my parents and moved back closer to home. This time for good and this time without threats nor extortion. Now at 30 my partner and I are planning for kids and my mom is considering moving to me for the next chapter of life. But leaving them with a babysitter who's paid and agreed to do it is guilt free for both of us, because even though we feel it's fair to trade off and don't mind, it is still leaving one of us with extra When my grandmother left my grandfather she asked my mom and my aunt to go with her and they both said no. My kid (11) is free range and has been left alone at home since he was five. I'm too tired to do it now, although I still try. She did split my portion between my two children. She is being very vindictive all because I was tired of being lied to by her over and over again. I’m so conflicted. Then if he comes near you or contacts you, he can be arrested. Original Post: here First off, thank you for all the love and support(and constructive criticism). They range in age from 13-23. But she didn’t cut contact with them. For context: I haven't seen my full family together in quite some time, so they set up a get together at a park today. My monthly pension is reduced each month so my kids receive this. he works… Like, leaving my kids with my husband is a tiny but manageable amount of guilt- he feels the same about leaving them solely with me. So I left. I did my best but my mental health started getting worse everyday. If I remember correctly, your wife overdosed because of this, your brother ran away, you have relatives now living in the house taking care of the kids and you wrote the kids letters instead of talking to them in person. I went on to always doing a lot for everyone. I haven't spoken to my oldest children about my conversation with my youngest yet. I couldn't refuse and stayed. Help keep the sub engaging! Don’t downvote assholes! AITAH for leaving my husband's kids out of my will? I (52F) married John (58M) 15 years ago. He didn't want a baby momma, and she had to meet certain standards as far as he was concerned. I couldn't do enough for that kid. She does not. That being said, my parents were overjoyed to hear about their first grandbaby. Living with my son. 1: You need to deal with this in the state you live in now, and you need to deal with it before you leave. Over the past 2 and a half years, my marriage has gone completely downhill thanks to a series of fuckups on his part (to summarize- quit his old job without telling me and getting us evicted, getting so drunk at an office party that he threw up all over the taxi we were in and costing us hundreds of dollars in cleaning fees Paid off my mortgage and quit my job after my wife died. Guys I’m feeling beyond sad because I’m going on a trip tomorrow without any of my three kids. This is something my parents would do. Not sure why I’ve written this, but it would be good to hear a non-bias opinion. You will feel differently before long. The only reason I come back is for my child. The first year after she insisted on being alone, and we felt her being gone. NTA. A lawyer perhaps can help you figure out custody arrangements for the kids that aren’t their absent father. I found a job that lets me work remote doing freelance design work and I've had my passport since I was a kid because of our family vacations overseas. I’m glad OP took the upgrade for herself, she deserves a vacation from her trip! I've got some money saved up, a good amount and I'm leaving the country. Kids and Teens do pick up on it- My grandpa died about 5 years ago. How do I leave my house to the kid so when I die he just " continues on"and can just pay property taxes? He did. The reasons aren’t missing, they’re in the post. I started 'enabling' with my kid brother (I might have done it with my whole family). My buddies and I found some great deals on Super Bowl tickets in LA, so we bought the tickets and we flew out on the day before the Super Bowl. My other time, and I got bullied for it, was giving up my kid after a 2 year fight with CPS because my abusive mother was throwing everything she could at me to see what would stick so that she could get full custody of my child, her beloved grandbaby. ouu tnk yytyxk izggsg ugdepx idmnz sskmhcf folq rnmdmrl bnqma